here is what happened:

i went to the gym at 5 to meet with my personal trainer woman. she is 23, from north carolina, and we probably hung out with different crowds in high school.

i listened to joy division and baltimore club music, ran for 45 minutes, did ab stuff, went to a yoga class, drove home.

stood in front of my refrigerator for about four minutes before deciding on making spinach/mushroom risotto with shrimp and asparagus.

did that.

went out to get white wine.

got back and my fucking cat ate my asparagus


ate everything, watched "friends" on t.v., got a little tipsy.

decided to take out the trash, clean out the fridge, and sanitize my kitchen.

did that.

have been watching dumb and dumber on tbs, getting more drunker, petting my cats, and am about to finish two art projects.

it's okay.

being here is okay.

i feel almost not completely depressed anymore.

i feel medium depressed.

last night i did art, watched the darjeeling limited, got stoned, looked at the internet, masturbated, and fell asleep.

today i did nothing except for what i just described. most of today i was inside, sitting quietly.

this is my space in the world i guess. whatever whatever. whatever.