when i go outside i try to mentally will the world to "missed connect" me. i concentrate very hard on thinking "you need to craigslist me, you need to craigslist me, you need to craigslist me," while making subtle eye contact.

i was in baltimore's b magazine because of something i tweeted on their twitter page.

i like wavves the band. especially the song "teenage super party."

i drank two full moon beers and fell asleep watching mtv.

i woke up two hours later.

i have been wearing the same thing for four days.

i live in constant fear of obesity.

most of my time on the internet is spent refreshing the same pages repeatedly.

most of the appeal of smoking cigarettes is so i can have something to do with my hands. it takes attention off of what would otherwise be distracting mental processes. i make eye contact better when i am holding a cigarette. their taste has progressed from 'horrible' to 'tolerable' for me.

today i have to go to work and class. i have to take notes for deaf people. fuck.

my evolutionary psychology professor calls all living creatures "critters." he has a desert tortoise named "yortiss" (or "yortoise," i don't know). tomorrow is charles darwin's 200th birthday, so he is bringing cake for us today. i have urges to hug him during lecture. i think he is a good dad, if he has kids.

some days i have zero interesting thoughts. the more busy my life is, the less interesting thoughts i have, i think. my life is rarely busy with things i want it to be busy with, but busy with other things like school and work and errands and bullshit.

most people i know need to "go out" a lot, i don't like going out, but i feel the need to be social.

i tried reading tom robbins the other day but i can't anymore. he is irritating. i think he looks at himself in the mirror for a long time after masturbating. i have a tom robbins tattoo of the cover of "still life with woodpecker." i don't want to talk about it.


ryan manning said...

i think i have never tried reading tom robbins, but i remember someone i like telling me they liked his work and therefore i felt obligated to try reading it, but the notion of actually doing so makes me feel bored

tomhanks said...

i do not recommend reading tom robbins

most of his writing, i think, has the intention of "being clever/cheeky/showy," to the point of being distracting and annoying and unrelatable

ryan manning said...

i think i will not read it

thank you for helping to simplify my life

also, i like the idea of willing the world to 'miss connect' you

i feel that my life is a series of missed connections

Tao Lin said...

i like your blog posts

do you write things in other places also, like poems or something

tomhanks said...

i'm glad you like my posts.

i do write other things, poems and short stories and things, but i don't post them on a blog. i was considering it, though. i don't know.

Tao Lin said...

i would be interested in reading them

ryan manning said...

i concur with the above statement

DJ Berndt said...

if it helps to hear from someone you've never heard of, I would also be interested in reading your work.